caffeinatrix (caffeina) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Much-needed space

Tonight I am alone for a little bit. I have this intense need for solitude sometimes, I need it to recharge, and lately I've been around people, people, people. It's not that I don't love my friends, or my boyfriend, that's totally not it, it's just that I need to sit around and loaf and stare at the ceiling and wander around in circles and just think quiet thoughts.

People are so amazing and interesting that I spend a lot of energy paying attention to them, observing them, analyzing and interpreting them, and it starts to feel kind of overwhelming sometimes.

The drag is that my boyfriend and I were kind of tense when he left this evening, and he wound up leaving feeling hurt and upset with me. I think that something I said about boredom hurt his feelings, or hit a nerve - but I was also trying to think of whether or not I could get a bit of space without having to ask, demand, hurt feelings or make a big deal out of it... Then he kind of started getting ready to leave in a bit of a huff. Hm. I kissed him when he left, and let him know that I love him, though, so maybe it's ok.

The bitch of it is, just as I'd closed the door and flopped down on my bed to play with my new legos, the doorbell rang again and it was my friend Archie coming by to go for a drink, and he'd brought a DVD for us to watch. I didn't feel like a drink, really but I could have gotten in to the DVD thing. Unfortunately, my rawk-star housemate had the livingroom totally occupied with a bunch of dinks watching A Clockwork Orange as they worked on their Droog costumes for Halloween, and they weren't going anywhere anytime soon. Damnit! Fucking Droogs!

I AM 68% GOTH.

Image and attitude are my paths to Goth-dom.
Graceful and scary. I am the Master, with
many slaves.

Take the GOTH Test at!


  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.